Unbolting the Dark, A Memoir traces the author's psychological and spiritual journey at midlife to understand the profound impact of her mother's death. This inward search becomes an actual journey that includes nine months in England at the University of Cambridge, six months at a monastery in Switzerland, and a year and a half in seminary in New York City as she prepares for ordination as an Episcopal priest. This reflective and inspiring book draws on the author's extensive knowledge of philosophy in classical and late antiquity to explore the pagan and Christian Platonist tradition of turning inward as a way of knowing God. As Spellman uncovers what she did not previously know about herself, she also discovers the presence of a goodness and love that transcends us all.